• I had a dream that I had died. Tired of living, I found the relief I had been searching for in the bottom of a bottle of painkillers that I had recently stolen from my mother. As I lay on my bed I could feel myself slipping away from reality, looking at old photographs of better times. After a while I found my consciousness fading slowly. I fell backwards looking at the ceiling as it spiralled around me in a dizzy array until there was nothing but darkness.

    When I awoke, I was greeted by a beautiful sunny sky and the sounds of birds chirping in the distance. I sat up while rubbing my aching head and noticed I was on a paved road that seemed to stretch out as far as the eye could see. On ether side of this road was amazingly lush forests. So green and the trees so tall. Something very few people get to see. Standing up I could feel the hot road on the bottom of my bare feet. I rubbed my eyes to see if what I was seeing was actually real, but when when I dropped my hands it was still there. Looking around there wasn't much else I could do so I started to walk the long road.

    Was this really a dream? But how could that be? I could breath and smell the fresh air. So clean and different from the city. I could feel things like the heat from the cement road that the sun had warmed up and the cool breeze on my cheeks. How could this be a dream? Maybe I had really died and this was the afterlife, but I didn’t feel dead.

    It seemed like an eternity of endless walking until I finally stopped. The road had ended giving way to grass and the trees weren’t as thick anymore. I silenced the confusion I was feeling as I looked both ways to see where I was. I hadn’t the clue but I still looked. When I faced forwards again there was a man in front of me. It was like he just appeared out of thin air. He was an elderly gentlemen. With greying hair and a long face that had seen many days. His brown eyes smiled at me.

    “Hello?” I said. My voice was scratchy like I hadn't talked in a while. “Where are we? Is this a dream? Who are you?” I asked one question after another. He gave no response. He just smiled at me and held his hand out to me. There was an aura of calmness about him that I just could not resist so out of instinct my hand went to his. The feeling of his skin felt so new to me, even though I had touched and held peoples hands before. He started to lead me on the grassy path it looked like it had been used many times. It felt so cool on my feet. Better then the road had. “Where are we going?” I asked.

    “Home.” It was a short answer. Then he started to talk again. But I could not hear what he was saying.

    He led me into a small village full of huts. From different cultures and older times. It seemed vibrant enough. People bustling about their day. It was odd I could hear them speak so clearly yet I could not hear what the man holding my hand was saying. Not wanting to think about it too much as I was being guided somewhere and did not want to make him wait for me. I had a sense of misplacement for walking threw the village in my pajamas but the feeling went away quickly enough when the elderly man led me to a giant hill. It had a stone staircase built into it and entire way up was shaded by trees with pink and orange blooming buds.

    As we climbed the stairs I looked up. The trees acting like walls and intertwining with each other to make the staircase like a tunnel, but the sun peaked threw every now and again illuminating it. Taking my breath away and leaving me in awe. This had to be a dream, I thought. There was no way something so beautiful really existed. It wasn’t long until we got to the top and entered a courtyard. We took a few steps and then stopped again. He let me take a look around this garden of Eden. If this was a dream, I didn’t want to wake from it.

    It was surrounded by flowers and trees. It was a garden full of life. My heart was fluttering at the beauty of all of this. On one side there was a building that could only be described as a Japanese dojo or large house from the warring era of Japan. Like the ones I saw in the old Japanese movies and mangas. It looked brand new and untouched by time. On the other side of the courtyard was a very large tree. It stood out from the other because it had no leaves, only flowers. They were pink and white, they seemed to glow. Some of them where falling and that is when I noticed him. A child. No more then ten years old sitting under the tree. He looked like he was crying.

    Letting go of the mans hand I found myself drawn to the boy. I knelt down, pulled him up so he was standing, and rubbed my hand on his cheek, trying to brush some of the beautiful tears away. “What’s wrong?” I asked him sympathetically.

    The boy looked up at me. His purple eyes caught me off guard. It wasn’t normal. But nothing here has been. His eyes were filled with so much sorrow and something else. Something I could not put my finger on. “It’s not right...it’s not right” He said repeatedly in a unsteady.

    “What’s not right?” I asked running my hand threw his black hair trying to soothe the weeping child. He slowly leaned into me. Barring his face into my chest. Sobbing more. Wrapping my arms around him I started to rub his back. I looked over to the man as he averted his eyes almost as if he didn’t want to look into my eyes or felt guilty for some reason. Raising an eyebrow I shook it off to return to consoling the poor boy.

    “There, there” I could feel him trembling in my arms and I felt helpless. “I'm here so there is no need to cry anymore.” I whispered to him. Suddenly I felt pain in my stomach. A very sharp pain and then another. I shoved the boy away from me I looked down in horror to see a knife in me. The blade had been twisted. Everything seemed to slow down. I started to get dizzy. I Looked over to the man but he had the same look on his face. Did he lead me here knowingly? Anger over took me but then it was washed away to a sickening feeling when I looked back down and struggled to pull the knife out. Blood starts to pour out of me spraying everywhere. The knife fell from my hands. It fell to the ground making a loud clanging sound. Falling to my knees I looked up at the boy. I wanted to say something but I couldn’t speak. All I could do was wonder why. Why this was happening to me. What had I done?

    He stood over me, looking down at me. I could finally see what that other emotion was that was in his eyes; rage. His tears still fell, but he was smiling. It scared me. “It’s not right...it’s not right. Someone like you is not suppose to be in heaven!”

    I couldn’t breath anymore. My body was in so much pain and it felt so heavy that I fell to my side. The raspy breaths felt so foreign to me. Frantically I tried to crawl away, but did not make it far before I felt the darkness coming over me once again. The dark void that I could not fend off.

    I awoke once again, but this time I was in a bed. Not my own. I looked up and there was no sky, no sounds of nature. Just the sound from a heart monitor and a man. The same man from my dream but he was dressed as a ambulance worker. My eyes widened and I started to breath harder into the oxygen mask. "Easy does it" He said holding me down so I didn't jump squirm around. That couldn’t be right. it couldn't be him. I closed my eyes again feeling anxiety and looked at him again. No it was a different man, a younger man. He smiled down at me. “Welcome back. Thought we lost you for a second there”.