• chapterone: before i smiled,before i laughed,before i changed,my heart was as fragile as crystal. i didnt let anoyone get near me.i would spend days locked away in my room crying..but i never knew why.but my mother told me that i was born that way...born sad.as years went by,i became more depressed.but then,my depression transformed into a yearning.but what was i yearning for?the answers are with,my dear readers.we must travel to the beginning."shes such a beautiful girl.what should we name her james?""hmm...tsukiko.""a perfect name.tsukiko...huh?why are you sad,little one?" my smile turned into a frown.even though im sixteen,i still remember these moments like they were yesterday. an hour went by and i was crying.i had to be injected with something to help me sleep.during my slumber,i seen a beautiful girl who looked as though she was 4. her skin was golden and her eyes were a lovely brown.her hair was a sleek black.her voice was so sweet and she was so gentle.we played all day long in a little medow near a forest somewhere.i woken up to see myself in my mothers arms.a few months passed and in all my dreams was that little girl.but one day,it all changed.as usual we were playing tag.then all of a sudden,she began to age.she was 8 years old,then she was 12,and so on.by the time she was a full feldged adult,she began to fade. before she fadded away,she picked me up and craddled me in her arms.she also told me something ill never forget."im sorry that i cant play with you.but remember that im always in our heart,my lily."i was speaking baby language,but somehow she understood."my name is loyal....loyal payton..."she sat me down and gave me a lily flower and she disapeared.her laughter filled the air.crying,i woke up to find that same lily in my hand. i whispered to myself"she is real..." and hugged the flower.