silver wind

• Artist: kittycat23333
• Description: i just wanted to put my first writing poetry so just tell me if you like it
• Date: 07/31/2008
• Tags: thesilverwind

A river that runs along,
feels it silky water.
A cloud that goes by,
lands on the other side.
A moon that has shined,
lights the dark nights.
A flower that smells sweet,
is part of the silver wind.

Comments

[CocoCreole]

gud 3/5

[CazzyxBear]

I like the image that it puts in my mind but... i dunno. i agree with Alitare. 2/5

[Cottoncandyocbra3]

This feels like you are grabbing at footholds that aren't there. I think you could do wiht making the poem more cohesive. 1.5/5