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I don't even know where to begin, wether it be this moring or just bits and pieces throughout the day.

There's this science teacher that holds a raffle for the teachers every so often and she did one at the begining of the year. Well, she was asking my American Government teacher if she wanted one and then she asked me if I wanted one too and then realized I wasn't a student teacher. My A.G teacher and I thought it was kinda funny for making such a silly mistake.

Today, that same teacher was asking my A.G. for a raffle ticket and I was trying to ask her if she remembered that same time, and if it was that science teacher who thought I was a student teacher but got interupted. So, when my A.G. teacher asked me what it was, the science teacher snapped at me, said: "no, shut up, this doesn't involve you." Then she continued on to say: "and you didn't buy a raffle ticket last time and your not going to do it again this time." When she was done, she came up to me and started spraying out how I acted like I was 12 years old and then asked my age and I said: "18."

The she said: "It was me. You were trying to embarrss me, weren't you?" I didn't answer and she continued with: "Look, she's not saying anything. She was." and walked out of the room.

What the in the world did I do to deserve such treatment? First of all, how is that embarrasing her? There was nothing to laugh at her about and my A.G. teacher was there when it happend. There was no intension of being mean, it was just a funny memory. Kinda like when my friend fell off the stage in the dark and we still bring it up and all laugh about it, her included. I don't understand what went through her head but truth be told, lots of people mistake me for being a student teacher or even just a regular teacher. I'm more of the joke than she was making the mistake. Yeesh.

I still can't get over how I was treated though. That makes her a hipocrite, embarssing me. Shame on her for such an attitude. =/

Then during advisory (kinda like homeroom/study hall) my peers were selling these Harmon bracelets for 1 dollar. I clearly said in a joking way: "Could I buy those and sell them for 1.50 each?" My friend Diana blurted out: "Abbey, your stupid." and barely laughed afterwards.

Then in jewlery, I walked in and saw something fly and flap it's wings near the glass ceiling that slants over the classroom. I asked: "Is that a bat?" o-O
Then this girl, who's really rude, said in a snotty way: "Bats fly in the dark. It's a bird Abbey." and then she started talking about it to her friends in spanish while they laughed at me. One said: "Oh my god, she's so stupid."

Well excuse me, before making such a statement there are bats who fly during the day, which I turned around and stated but they were too busy to hear me. Infact, there is a bat during the summer that flys through my backyard while the sun is still up. It was a simple mistake and there didn't need to be a reason to call me stupid for it. Don't tell me to use common sense when it was flying at the speed at which it could not be recognized untill perched on top of something viewable.

So yeah, I spent my whole day near tears and ridicule and I'm still about to jump up screaming: "******** IT. I'M GODDAMN SICK OF THIS s**t." Which I do every other day of my pathetic life. I truely just want to hang myself at this point but something just keeps me moving along, telling me to hold on alittle longer.

There's just nothing for me to go for because I can't do anything that I like doing. Sure, I'll go to college but afterwards, who's going to hire an ugly girl with just as much talent as that shining beauty? These days are runned by looks, I swear...

"Don't criticize unless you can do it too." -Endy