• Cancer. Of all the things I could have died from it was cancer. The doctors said it was from all those Cuban cigars but you know I can't resist the taste of a good cigar. I fought demons, samurai, self righteous dictators, other ninja, wizards, and all other nasties. I served on the force for 15 years training others to hunt and kill things that would harm people. But cancer was the last thing I thought would kill me.
    I woke up and turned off my alarm clock. I had retired from the force early do to my “illness”. I went into the kitchen and made some eggs. Eggs can be so good if made properly. I put some onions, cheddar, and chives. Into the eggs and ate it. It was fantastic.
    I had been making all of my food really well lately. I think it was because I knew that it might be my last meal and I didn’t want some crappy TV dinner. I finished my eggs then sat down at my couch and watched tv.
    “Why is there never anything on?”
    Just then I heard my phone ring. I walked up to get it and my old assistant Greg was on the phone.
    “Timmy?”
    “Hi Greg.”
    “How you feeling?”
    “Fine if I wasn’t coughing out my lungs every morning.”
    We talked on the phone for hours talking about the “old days” and what was new in our lives. Greg had taken leadership of DSHD. I would have taken the job but I figured I was better at stabbing than leading. So I recommended my assistant Greg.
    We said our goodbyes and then I decided today would be a good day to go and visit relatives so I called up Jessy and Freddy. I left in my faded red pickup truck and headed for Freddy’s dojo.
    Freddy had worked with me and Jessy for a year or two before opening his dojo back up again. He still mostly taught stick and sword fighting.
    I went inside and there were my siblings. Freddy had lost an inch over the years but he still looked vicious as could be. Jessy had been recalled to the war for awhile and came back seeming a lot more worn out. She still scared me.
    We greeted each other and had a conversation until the subject came up.
    “How long?” Freddy asked.
    “FREDDY!” Jessy screamed.
    “It’s ok Jessy.”I said.
    “No it’s not!” She said with bits of frustration in her voice. “If your going to put an expiration date on yourself don’t tell me what it is cause I don’t think I could take it.” She then ran out of the room trying and failing to hold back tears.
    That was the scariest thing I had ever seen. I had always figures Jessy was the toughest. But I suppose everything is mush when family is involved.
    “So how long?” Freddy said after a minute.
    “Two months.”
    “Ok.”
    We said our goodbyes and I decided to walk home.
    On my way back I heard a woman scream in a nearby building. I looked to see if any police were around. Nope. Did I have my cell phone? Nope. I sighed and ran into the building.
    Inside the building was covered in blood. The woman was upstairs so I ran as fast as my smoker’s lung would allow it. I got to the top floor and there was this woman in the corner of the room in the feeble position. In front of her were these three angry looking men. I got a closer look and noticed something I hoped I wouldn’t notice. Pale skin, large teeth, and blood dripping from their mouths. I friggin hate vampires.
    I pulled a shuriken and threw it at one of the vampires. Direct hit, back of the head. The other two looked at me and charged. I pulled my sword but my draw isn’t as fast as it used to be. One football tackled me to the ground and prepared to tear my throat out. The other stood over me cheering the other. I managed to get my feet out of the grapple and kicked the first vampire off of me and to the ground. I then jumped up and impaled the second with my sword. The vampire stood back up and tripped me with a kick to the ankle. But I managed to shift my weight and land on him. We both stood up and were in the middle of a grapple. I screamed to the woman “RUN!” She got up and jolted down the stairs. I punched the vampire and he flinched off of me. I drew my sword but he backhanded it out the window.
    As the glass of the window shattered it let more light into the room. He jumped back and screamed like a little girl. I then looked at the window, then at him, and then grabbed him by the collar and started edging him to the window. He screamed and flailed. He got me in the neck and chest several times with those claws of his. But I kept moving him to the window. An then with a final push out he went ... with me.
    He burned up on the fall down but I got to look forward to the three story drop. The sidewalk kept getting closer and closer and.
    I awoke in this room that looked a lot like a movie theater. I left to see what was outside. Outside there was this table filled with gourmet food and I saw my mom and dad talking and laughing. I went toward them expecting to be stopped by the guards. They asked me for a reservation. I searched my pockets but couldn’t find one.
    Just then a beautiful woman walked by and said to the guards “It’s okay guys he’s with me.”
    They stepped aside and me and Rose went off to do as we pleased.

    Cancer. Hah!