• Yesterday, upon the stair,
    I met a man who wasn't there.
    He wasn't there again today,
    I wish, I wish he'd go away...

    When I came home last night at three,
    The man was waiting there for me
    But when I looked around the hall,
    I couldn't see him there at all!
    Go away, go away, don't you come back any more!
    Go away, go away, and please don't slam the door...

    Last night I saw upon the stair,
    A little man who wasn't there,
    He wasn't there again today
    Oh, how I wish he'd go away...

    Hughes Mearns

    What does it mean when you can't sleep anymore? When you can't breathe for fear of being heard? When you fear movement, as that makes you more easily seen?
    At this time in my thirty years of life, I have never been more scared to live. Never been so ready to die. But when I prepare the noose, c**k the gun, prepare to jump... Why, I realize that it would be futile. He would haunt my death. I will never rid myself of him; why bring my death closer? What good would that do?
    So many questions... Had I the time I would answer every single one for you. But I must hide and run, even though I know it is pointless. But it gives me something to do, to distract myself with pointless motions.

    He will always be there.