Sorry if this is too long you can just read the first part if you want!
"I'm sorry!" His eyes were filling with tears as he said it, though she could just barely see it through the tears sliding down her own face. She had never seen him cry before, or even come close to crying for that matter. He had always acted so macho, solid as a rock.
"Sorry for what?" she sobbed. "Sorry you met me or sorry you broke my heart?" She faintly remembered a time when she had thought those lines were the cheesiest ones she had ever heard. How funny that now they were actually true. She felt lightheaded, like she was about to collapse. She took an uneasy, involuntary step towards him, praying she wouldn't fall flat on her face. He covered the extra space and took her nto his arms, rubbing his face in her hair.
"Don't you dare say that!" he said in a stage whisper. "Meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me!" She started sobbing even harder as his arms held the weight of her limp body. She could not see anymore through all of the tears in her eyes. All she could do was cling to him and savor this moment, for she knew that it would be over all too soon. In just a few moments he would walk out of her life, and he probably wouldn't even bother to look back. Her breath was coming in short, ragged gasps as she began to pull away from him, prepared to feel her soul rip in two as she did so. His arms tightened around her, holding her in place. He ducked his head so he could see her face. She tried to look away but there was no escaping his piercing blue gaze. Her eyes slid shut as his warm breath caressed her wet cheeks.
"Please don't make this harder than it already is" she pleaded quietly so only he could hear. "Please don't make it hurt anymore."
His pained gaze hardened into one of determination.
"I love you." His words rang in the silence of the room. Before she could even process them, his mouth was on hers, urgent and hungry.His hands were in her hair, buried in auburn curls. Her hands grabbed fisfuls of his shirt as she struggled to hold herself up. Applause and cheers erupted as the curtain closed. She broke away from hom, staggering backwards. She used her arm to wipe her mouth. The tears were coming faster now, streaming down her cheeks uncontrollably. She had to remind herself that this wasn't real. It was just a part of the play. Everything he had just said was just an act, a lie. He began to walk towards her.
"Don't come near me!" she cried, taking a step back. He didn't stop. As his arms encircled her shoulders, she began to hit his chest repeatedly with her fists. She kicked him and clawed at his face, but he wouldn't let go. Finally her arms fell loosely at her sides. He obviously wasn't going to relent anytime soon. "Why are you doing this to me?" she whispered, looking down at her feet.
He lifted her chin with his finger until she was looking up into his face, using his thumb to wipe away the tears that were still running across her face. "Because I love you."
"Liar!" she cried, trying to break away again. His arms kept her right where she was. "If you love me then why are you putting me through so much pain?! You're breajing my heart all over again! Why are you hurting me?!"
"I'm sorry!" He was so close to crying now. "I'm so, so sorry." She just looked at him, her eyes filled with anger and hurt.
"You can apologize all you want. It won't change anything." She glared at him. "I hate you." His expression twisted in pain. The torture this caused inside her was startling. She began to reach her hand towards his face, wanting to wipe the hurt away, then jerked it back, but not before he had noticed.
"Do you?" he asked, analyzing her expression. "Do you really hate me? Answer honestly" he ordered. She wanted to say yes, wanted him to feel the way she had felt, but as she watched depression wash over him, as though preparing for the worst, she realized that no matter what he did she couldn't change the way she felt. She sighed dejectedly.
"No." His face brightened a little. "But I don't trust you!" she added before he could get his hopes up. His face grew serious.
"Do you love me?" Everything seemed to grow hushed in that moment, as though her answer could be life changing.
"Weren't you listening? I said that-"
"You said that you didn't hate me" he said, cutting her off. "I want to know if you love me."
"I...I don't...I can't..." She knew the honest answer, but he couldn't be trusted. She knew she didn't want to feel this kind of pain ever again, but without him her heart was an empty void. She took a deep breath. She knew what she had to do. She looked at him, at his shaky composure that was ready to shatter at any second. "I can't say no." In the moment he was processing her words she ducked out of his embrace and made a run for the nearest exit. She could hear his footsteps behind her. She made it out the door and into the cool night air before his hand grabbed her shoulder and spun her around to face him.
"I don't understand!" He looked confused and hurt as she tried to break free of his grasp.
"I love you!" she cried. "Okay? I love you!" She leaned her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes. " i love you so, so much." He pulled her against him, stroking her hair and making soothing noises as she finally broke completely down.
"Then why?" she heard him ask. "Why are you trying to get away?"
"Because it hurts to love you. It hurts when you act like you don't care. It hurts...so badly."
"Look at me." She shook her head. "Look at me" he repeated. Reluctantly she looked up into his face. "I care. I care about you more than anyhting. I know I can be an idiot and I'm sorry, but I love you. I can be better I-" She placed her finger over his lips, cutting him off.
"Shut up." He moved her hand from his face but didn't let go. She stood on tiptoe until her mouth was by his ear. "You have me." He turned his face and kissed her, and she didn't pull away. She didn't want to. This, here in his arms, was where she belonged.
"What do you mean you're leaving?!" Anne shouted. Landen stood across from her looking down at his clasped hands, his eyes flitting from side to side.
"I-I just c-can't do this" he stuttered, avoiding all eye contact with her. "There's j-just too m-much pressure."
"Too much pressure?!?!" she nearly shrieked. "This is theater! What were you expecting, a joy ride?!?!" Anne tried to calm herself but Landen was pushing her over the edge. How could he walk out like this?! They were days from performing and he decided to back out now?!?! There wasn't even an understudy for him. How were they supposee to pull this off without the main character?
"Jeez Anne pull yourself together. You're acting as if the world is about to end." Landen sounded annoyed. Anne felt herself raging inside. This was exactly the reason that she hated Landen so much. One second he was acting like some pansy and the next it was like he was some kind of A-list celebrity.
"It is about to end for me Jed!" She felt tears welling up in her eyes. "This was my big chance! I practiced all year for this roll! How could you do this to me? How can you leave me like this?" Anne couldn't believe the boy in front of her. Two months ago she had met him and, against her better judgement, she had trusted him, trusted him to work through this with her, to make this performance, her very first performance, a night she could remember. But she had been wrong. He had let her down.
"You know Anne, not everything is about you" Landen retorted in that annoyingly snobbish tone of his. Without another word, he turned and walked away. He left her there with tears streaming down her face. It was that day that she swore off theater and decided to hate Landen Cowell for the rest of her life.
Chapter One “Just a few more days” Anne said to herself as she marked off another day on the calendar pinned to the inside of her locker. “Just a few more.”
“Anne, come on! You’re holding everybody up!”
“I’m coming!” Anne took one last look at the calendar before closing her locker. She turned to find her best friend, Mira, standing at the school entrance tapping her foot impatiently while a couple of Anne’s other friends chatting behind her. “You guys didn’t have to wait for me” Anne mumbled as she drew up in front of Mira.
“Yes we do” Mira insisted. “What kind of a best friend would I be if I just left you all alone?” Anne laughed. She knew the real reason Mira had hung back. She was hoping to get a look at Josh Pesky, the star jock of Sanctum High. A couple days ago Anne had let slip to Mari that Josh Pesky’s locker was just two away from her own. “Are you ready to go?”
“Yeah, I guess” Mira sighed, still looking over Anne’s shoulder. She gave a dejected sigh and then turned away to walk with Anne through the school’s front doors out into the cold winter air.
“My car is at the back” Anne sighed as she and Mira pulled their jackets tighter against themselves.
“What did you park way back there for?” Mira asked in an annoyed tone as he pulled her car keys out of her pocket.
“I got a late start this morning. By time I got here all of the good spots were taken.” Anne shrugged nonchalantly as she said this.
“Anne you have got to pull it together. This is our senior year! The back of the parking lot is for sophomores” Mira said, making a disgusted face as she said the last word. Anne chuckled. Mira was always such a drama queen; in other words, she was the exact opposite of Anne. “Well, see you later Anne” Mira said as they came upon her cherry red convertible, a sixteenth birthday present from her parents.
“Yeah, see you” Anne replied as she continued to walk towards the ‘sophomore’ end of the parking lot. She shivered as a cold wind blew through the grounds. For once she agreed with Mira; she really needed to park closer.
It took about five minutes for Anne to reach her car, a beat up, sky blue Cadillac. Sure it wasn’t as flashy as Mira’s convertible but Anne liked to think that it had more personality. She reached in her coat pocket and fumbled for her car keys. Just as she got them out and was ready to unlock her car door, someone bumped roughly into her, causing her keys to go flying and land about five feet away. Anne cursed under her breath as she turned to see who had shoved her. The words that she had been ready to shout however never managed to leave her mouth.
She was staring up into the face of Josh Pesky.
"Um...my keys..." Anne stuttered as she looked into those gorgeous blue eyes.
"What?" His brow puckered in confusion. Then his eyes found her keys lying a few feet away. "Oh! Your keys! Jeesh I'm so sorry!" He moved around her to retrieve the the keys as Anne continued to starte at the now empty space in front of her, insisting that this must be a dream because Josh Pesky could not be talking to her, an authentic theater nerd, right now. "Here you go." Anne gave a start when she felt his hand on her shoulder. "Sorry!" he said hastily. "I was just trying to get your attention... you were kinda staring off into space." Anne shook herself out of her stupor.
"Sorry" she muttered, taking her keys from him. He smiled sympathetically.
"S'okay." He shrugged nonchalantly.
"Well thank you for getting my keys for me" Anne said looking down at her feet in an attempt to hide the blush that was covering her face. She began to turn away, praying that someday she would be able to live down this embarassing moment.
"Hey, wait." Anne froze. "I haven't seen you before. What's your name?"
"Anne" she muttered without turning around.
"Sorry I missed that what was it again?" It sounded like he was laughing at her. For some reason Anne found this to be extremely annoying.
"It's Anne" she repeated, turning to look at him. Just as she had thought it looked like he was trying very hard to contain his laughter.
"You know", he said with a grin, "you're really cute when you're shy."
That's it for now!
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