• The late autumn air chilled us through our coats as we stood before the tall iron gates that surrounded the creepy haunted candy factory. Mongoose our mongoose shivered furiously as he adjusted his nerdy spectacles. He was cursed with Forever Alone one that prevented him from stuff and such. "Fggt." Muttered Jennifer to my left, hair black with a spot of grey. I nudged the small mongoose with the toe of my orange shoe pushing him towards the gate just in case there was a protective barrier around the factory. He fell through the bars with ease so it was safe to proceed. "Wait dumbass theres a lock! Mongoose is inside by himself HAH! Forever Alone!" My face twitched into a grimace "I see it! Merh!" I pointed at the lock with my index finger "Unlock or die!" It snapped open. Jennifer walked forward and stepped on Mongoose while she looked around the yard. "Your foot feels nice -w-" Said Mongoose creepily earning him another ten Creep points. Just then a large stone statue of Susan Boyle appeared at the front door of the factory "Begone! or fear my wrath!" it shouted. I looked away, she was so ugly she caused my face to twitch madly. Jennifer pulled out a small jar of Nutella from her manly Hello Kitty bag and tossed it at the hideous statue, it broke on it's head and exploded. "b***h. Now lets go, Sandra's trying to get out of my back-pack." She stepped off Mongoose and walked into the smoke cloud created by her nasty a** nutella. I walked up picked up Mongoose and my arm suddenly twitched causing it to pull back and fling Mongoose at the door. It was the Forever Alone curse and the cure was somewhere inside that factory, we were there to get it.


    The door to the factory opened with ease Mongoose held up his head and sniffed the air "I smell ***** farts." I wasn't quite sure what that meant but I immediatly looked at Jennifer "Did you just fart?" She frowned and pulled out a lantern in the shape of a nutella jar the light slaying any shadows that dared to stand too close. Mongoose climbed onto her shoulder and because of the Forever Alone curse she grabbed him by the neck and slammed him into the wall causing a new crack. Then we heard it "Oh my! Little boys! Ma favorite! Ahew!" suddenly the lights snapped on above us and we found ourselves in a place that resembled Candy Land from Hell there were jail cells from the floor to the high ceiling all filled with children. "You get the boys I want the little girl!" It was ***** Bear and to the left of him was Micheal Jackson alive and now asian instead of white. "Set the Laggern on them!" the sound of her name caused Mongoose to twitch and me to fall to my hands and knees blood pouring from my mouth. "You guys are being drammatic. like always. inconsiderate jerk." She muttered as she pulled out another nutella jar from her back-pack. Then the building began to shake "Ahew hew! here she comes!" Shouted MJ a little too happily I got up and immidiatly regretted it. There she was a ball of disgusting and nasty, short stubby dino arms and legs to match on each of her little feet she wore crocks and her blimp of a body covered by a very large ugly dress with flower print. "Laggren!" It roared and spat a large glob of Mayonnaise. I grabbed Mongoose and held him infront of me and right before it hit the ball shot upwards and stuck to the ceiling. The forever alone curse worked in our favor.Not even mayonnaise wanted to touch him. Then my arm twitched again and I flung him to the ground. Jennifer threw her nutella bomb at the Laggren but the beast opened it's nasty mouth and ate it. "Mongoose use thunderbolt!" I shouted, Mongoose responded by having a seizure


    I decided to go with plan B "I choose you! Cesar!" I threw a tamale and it transformed into a mexican "Cesar! Cesar!" Jennifer pulled a toaster from her bag and stuffed Cesar into it aiming at Laggren she fired he came out as a pop-tart and of course the ugly beast ate him. "Cesar use kidney kick attack!" "Ahew hew! She doesn't have kidneys! Its full of lard in there! your attack is useless!" My eye started to twitch. Jennifer took a picture of it with her cell and set it as her background. I glared. "Oh you!" she said evily and pulled out a fetus.

    Before The fetus could change into a wadache Laggren spat mayonasse at Jennifer, it hit her and hardened. "Da faq?!" she squeaked inside her cocoon of nastynessism. Mongoose managed to stop having a seizure and began to fire lightning bolts from his tail at the cocoon while I distracted Laggren by throwing deorderant sticks at her which caused her to disintegrate. "Oh no! Boss will be angry ahew hew!" cried MJ he grabbed his crotch and disappeared in a puff of green smoke. "Bah! I'm not leaving till I have her!" Yelled ***** bear pointing at Jennifer. I stood infront of ***** bear and squinted at him while unbuttoning my pants causing the situation to get so awkward the bear melted into a pile of jelly. "Now lets get the damn cure!" I shouted but then Jennifer dropped to her knees and clapped her hands over her ears Mongoose mimicked. "NO! JINGLE BELLS!" I sensed Ayala.


    She waddled out of the shadows her singing robot santa henchmen floating all around her horribly singing "Jingle bells" Jennifer now free from her cocoon of Mayo stood with a jar of explosive Nutella Mongoose growling his tail sparking with electricity, My mouth twitched as my hand was engulfed in a emerald flame Jennifer made a face at the color we stood our ground as the henchmen flew at us, I slammed my fist into the first one it immediately caught fire and flipped me off before disintegrating Jennifer handled more than half by madly throwing explosives and Mongoose fended off a large number of them with lightning until he exhausted his energy and started having a seizure again. "Here set this on fire!" Called Jennifer as she tossed me a large pumpkin I caught it and blinked "The hell am I supposed to do with this!?!" "Calm your tits and light it!" cautiously I held the pumpkin with both hands and set it ablaze. "Now! Gods of the mighty Nutella hear me and partake in this sacred emerald pumpkin offering! Come forth! Lady Gaga!" I heard Jenn shout right before the pumpkin erupted with light


    Lady Gaga appeared in a costume made up of pumpkins and began nomming on all the bots Ayala looked pissed I pointed at her and shouted "I call upon the power of prostitutes to lend me their power! Transform into a pumpkin!" Ayala shivered and changed into a small white pumpkin. A light suddenly descended from the ceiling it was the cure I ran up and snatched it and the building began to rumble. We ran out abandoning the imprisioned kids reaching the gate just in time to hear "Self destruct in 10" blare over the speakers. "Quick everyone get on my menstrual cycle!" Called Jennifer and tossed a pad onto the floor it unfolded into a motorcycle and we all got on and rode off just before the factory exploded